Happy Friday!!! And a much happier one at that because today is my birthday!!(this was to go up last week but life happened). I have no recollection of the last time I was this excited about my birthday; perhaps when I was turning eighteen or twenty one. Anyway for some reasons that I can’t point out I am just excited about the New Year. This year particularly is finding me in a space where I am actively and deliberately taking care of my well-being and being mindful of my mind space.

So in honor of turning twenty five, I will share twenty five things I would tell my younger self and hopefully I can resonate with someone out  there… especially a young girl that like me was a little lost. I did a similar post here two years ago.

1. Twenty seconds of insane courage is all you need to get things done. Just take a deep breath and press send on that email that you have been postponing or walk into that office or make that call that could change your life.
2. No is a word that you can use, and please use it without fear. It’s okay to say no if it doesn’t fall into your plan or if you do not wish to do something.
3. You don’t have to be rude to get your point across or tolerate rudeness for that matter. If it is rude and disrespectful just refer to number 2 above and walk away. You don’t have to take rudeness, because if they don’t value you now they will never value you.
4. Motives matter, if he liked you say for a physical feature that you have, its not going to last when the feature is gone. How you entered into the relationship really sets the foundation of how the relationship will run.
5. It is okay to dream… dare to think of the impossibilities and write them down…because they will come to pass. At least a number of them.

1. Act on your dreams, it’s never enough to dream, you need to work towards your goals and your mission… there is no short cut, just hard work.
2. You are attractive… and hell yes somebody will find you attractive. The thick thighs that you so hate right now and nappy hair on your head will become some type of fad in the future…which is beside the point. Better yet, someone will like them too.
3. Do what you are supposed to do, if you are in school, read. You will not regret it. There is always time for everything, but what you give priority matters in the end.
4. Everything good takes time… that dream carrier, or that dream relationship or whatever else that was in your dream takes time. Instant gratification is a myth…everything worth having and being proud of takes time and some sort of work into it.
5. Opening up is good… try and share bits and pieces of your life with others, the kind of vulnerability created enables you to feel the joy of loving and being loved.
6. But be careful to whom you open up…everything good comes with some level of caution and some level of risk.
7. It is okay to ask for help… don’t get stuck in your problem and or your ignorance alone…. Reach out
8. Everybody’s pain is valid including yours… Don’t ignore your pain because there is a perceived bigger problem in the world. Big problems started as small problems, so sort out yours before it becomes a big problem.
9. People will always say things, so quit trying to make them happy. The job of people is to say things, and your job is to grow and be the best version of you in imitation of CHRIST’S character.
10. Stick to your original plan…. This is so important especially I order to remain grounded and focused. If you must change your plan, have good reasons for doing so.
11. A little vanity won’t hurt… yaaas… facial care, nail care, a little pedicure… you need it.
12. Take care of yourself….this here just speaks for itself.
13. Happiness is a choice and it begins with you… you are 100% responsible for your own happiness and it is your duty to keep you there. Any other people or circumstances only come to enhance and assist you find your happiness. Nobody owes you happiness.
14. Have expectations… its natural and it helps you sift through people or products and situations. The only caution I would say is don’t let your expectations be too unrealistic and cloud your judgment.
15. Everybody will disappoint you and you will disappoint everyone, this is a constant fact of life. In fact, you just need to pick the disappointments that are worth your time and emotion.
16. It’s never that serious… don’t take things to heart and don’t overthink things.
17. Change is constant… everyone changes and that’s okay, because you change too. And nobody is guaranteed in your life forever so run with those who fit in your change.
18. Forgive yourself… because you will make a couple of mistakes that you will regret, but that is how learning happens. Through making mistakes do we become better.
19. When people show you who they are the first time believe them… that is how simple life is. While benefits of doubt are good things, not everyone is worth giving a benefit of doubt.
20. GOD….when everything is said and done…it still remains that HIS opinion is what matters… what HE thinks of you, and if anything else in this post doesn’t make sense… I hope this does. It is the most objective thing that I have said in this post.

Twist out  –Saru Organics Shea and Avocado butter

Dress – thrift from Toi Market

Sending love and sunshine your way

Nyake.